Main Characters

	Jaime: Jaime is occasionally referred to as Dykey Peterson by the rest of Sconeborough, though in their defense she came up with it herself. Her enemies are ants, puppies that eat the world, and small rodents that live in her sweater drawer. She is fond of cute bat-shaped things and is also Kylie's girlfriend.
	Kylie: Kylie loves every color on the planet and some that can only be found on Mars and Jupiter. She also bakes a mean pie. "Your mom" insults guaranteed or your money back! While Kylie and Elsie share a love of cats, Kylie's love leads to situations that can only be classified as Cat Emergencies. Kylie is Elsie's older sister.
	Elsie: Elsie grows plants, occasionally plants of the face-eating variety and occasionally plants of the world domination variety. But you didn't read that. She uses robot force (named Ted) to keep cats from shitting in her garden. She is all about inventing crazy things, though "crazy" almost never equates with "useful."
	Nicky: Nicky is sometimes what's known as a smooth operator. Directing calls is no easy task, my friend. Contrary to beliefs held by really confused people, Nicky is, in fact, male. Just don't ask him for proof. He and Elsie have big plans regarding the fate of the world.
	Elizabeth: The somewhat obligatory self-insert character which I try to put in the comic as little as possible because it's really weird drawing myself as a cartoon! Occasionally it's necessary considering Sconeborough is (very loosely) based on things that happen to me and the rest of my friends. Comic Elizabeth is a bit angrier and more cynical than real life Elizabeth. Just a little.
	Ted: Ted is a robot invented by Elsie to keep cats away. Unfortunately, Ted is also a robot who is scared of just about everything. Fortunately, everyone loves him anyway!
	Ghost Cat: Ghost Cat is... well, he's Ghost Cat. Ghost cat is a cat who was possessed by a mostly inoffensive but thoroughly annoying ghost. While he doesn't plan on vacating his kitty body anytime soon, nobody really cares enough to make him leave, especially if a lack of opposable thumbs hasn't deterred him yet.

Other Characters

	Nikki: Nikki, though having the same name (almost), is actually not Nicky but a separate entity, an entity that exists in a higher plane of l33t. Nikki knows more languages than most humans, including languages that only work for computers. She is like that jolly old neighbor on Home Improvement who never showed his face to anyone, minus some jolly and a lot of old.
	Dessy: Dessy is Sconeborough's unintentional token black chick. She has a healthy fear of robots taking over the world, meaning Ted actually manages to scare someone besides himself.
	Rashied: And Rashied, of course, is Sconeborough's... token Iranian? Rashied is all about making cool things happen through the power of science.
	Sarah: Sarah is Sconeborough's voice of reason. Every now and then, she steps in to help point everyone in the right direction. Well, her direction, anyway.
	Cecil and Bronston: Two upstanding Tyrannosaur gentlemen lovers (that is a mouthful). They're like those gossipy old ladies in hair salons. Actually, they probably are those gossipy old ladies.
	Sadwich: Sadwich really should have his own comic by now, but for now, he's still part of this one. Sadwich has issues with the fact that he exists. He'd rather die the honorable way (suicide) than be eaten by some hungry human.
	Burnt Toast: Sadwich's associate. He tries to get Sadwich back on the road to salvation, but Burnt Toast is a bit too burned out to help anyone, much less himself.
	Catbone: We're not quite sure what it is or how it got here, but we know for a fact that the catbone is, indeed, connected to the catbone.